Drop Your Dead Weight

February, some say it's the month of love, but I say it's the month of "how the fuck did I get this fat?!"

Typically this month we feel a bit of self loathing, compensated with heavy drinking. However, things are different this time around; I've found a solution.

Carry-A-Chris! It's the craziest new lifestyle change that everyone will be wanting to make.

Eat whatever you want, drink as much as you want (heavier the better) and still lose weight!

"Jazz, how is this possible - how can I live my best life while taking care of my temple?"

Chris Murphy resting after a long day of changing lives..and drinking.

EASY, just carry a fucking Chris. For the low low payment of bacon, whiskey and the occasional blow job - Chris will come to your home and let you carry him where ever you go, for 1 month.

That's 185 lbs of sexy, motivating you (berating you until you hate looking at yourself in the mirror) towards your goal.

Check out Carry-A-Chris live in action!

Another satisfied customer!

Wanting to be #couplegoals and workout with your #swolemate? Chris does threesomes too!

People have even built relationships with their Chris, spending time together after their sessions. "He just really cares and lets me, be me," says James, a man obsessed with the 80's.

80's obsessed man lays with his Chris

Change your life today, call Chris at 1-800-666-FUCK.

Carry-A-Chris: Fat today, a little less fat tomorrow.

#weightloss #heyfatty #CarryAChris